Conference questions and answers

I came to conference with questions this time around. There were three specific ones that I had in my head and in my heart. I had not written them down, but I knew what they were.

Similar answers came to each question, but not in the same talks.

It has caused me to reflect on how my process of receiving answers to prayers works. Doctrine & Covenants gives us some clues to general processes in the Lord’s instructions to Oliver Cowdrey in sections 6, 8 and 9. You know them: ponder, pray, think about your own solutions and your own process, feel peace in heart and mind, feel a burning in the bosom, and remember what you’ve learned.

Joseph Smith taught this about divine instruction:

When you feel pure intelligence flowing into you, it may give you sudden strokes of ideas, so that by noticing it, you may find it fulfilled the same day or soon; (i.e.) those things that were presented unto your minds by the Spirit of God, will come to pass; and thus by learning the Spirit of God and understanding it, you may grow into the principle of revelation, until you become perfect in Christ Jesus.”
(Teachings of the Prophet Joseph Smith, sel. Joseph Fielding Smith [1976], 151.)

I’ve written before that my answers to prayer rarely come during the prayer, almost never during the first prayer.

As I prepared for this particular conference, I had three broad questions in my mind. One concerned one of my children, one concerned my job, and one concerned a health concern of mine. These are not questions specific to conference, since these three items have been occupying my prayers off and on for months. But I looked at conference as one opportunity among many to receive guidance.

What I found is that guidance came. Some of it came in overarching themes, and some in specific quotations. A particular sentence in a particular talk struck me in a particular way. A story related by a speaker related to one of my issues. Recurring and connecting themes from several talks united to offer instruction and comfort.

In the end, most of my answers were comforting answers rather than go-and-do answers this time. That’s not always so. But this time I was counseled to be patient and to trust that the Lord can do His work. He has a way to accomplish what He needs to accomplish. That message is reassuring to me.

As I reflected on the Lord’s instructions through the prophet Joseph, it occurred to me that the Lord did whisper peace to my heart and mind. The Lord did cause my bosom to burn as I pondered ideas I had about my questions. And I felt what I assume is the pure intelligence, the sudden strokes of ideas that Joseph described. Not everything happened at once. And I am not sure I recognized each of those events as they happened, some only were clearer after the fact. But I do know that answers came.

These particular questions are still too tender for me to discuss in great detail, which makes this essay less readable; for that I’m sorry. But hopefully my writing will encourage you to think about how conference spoke to you – or that is, how the Lord spoke to you through conference.

A remarkable conference-based sacrament meeting

Our ward is similar to many: speakers are typically given a general conference talk to frame their topic for their talks. And the results are similar to other wards’, too. We have some speakers who say, “I was asked to talk about President Monson’s talk from….” And other speakers who did what ours did on Sunday.

This sacrament meeting was particularly delightful in several ways. First, all the speakers (including the youth speaker) were women. That happens once in a while in our ward, just as it happens once in a while that all the speakers are men. Our bishopric doesn’t seem to worry too much about making sure each meeting is gender-balanced, and that’s great from my point of view. (I should point out our youth speaker was awesome, but I’m going to write today about our adult speakers.)

Second, the two adult speakers were former Relief Society presidents from our ward. And I was bishop when they both were called. So you can imagine I was pretty excited to hear from them both in sacrament meeting.

Third, both the adult speakers had been given the same talk as a starting point for their remarks, Elder Holland’s “Laborers in the Vineyard” from last April’s conference. I love Elder Holland, and I particularly loved that talk. If you can’t instantly remember it, go back and have a look; you’ll be glad you did.

Fourth, although they were both assigned the same talk, each of their talks was strikingly different from the other. Both messages were remarkably complementary without overlap. (I know sometimes things don’t work that way. Sometimes the talks overlap quite a bit. But this was not one of those times.) Each of their talks referenced Elder Holland’s address and the parable that formed the core of his talk, but each one also included personal experiences and testimony to reinforce the message of the day.

And that’s why it was so delightful. Each of these sisters prepared remarks that spoke to her experience in life and in the gospel. Those personal experiences were as important as the words of the apostle they each quoted, because those experiences served as additional witnesses of the truth. For me, that’s a way that sacrament meeting talks can be relevant and revelatory: as I hear the thoughts and life experience of the speaker, I can also find parallels in my own life with which I can connect myself to the message. As I do that, the Spirit helps me connect even more deeply, and I come away edified.

I’m no longer in a position to plan sacrament meetings, but if I were, I think I would rely less on general conference talks. (I did it because a bishop I served with did it, and at the time it was a valuable practice for me, and for the ward where we served.) Of course there’s nothing wrong with focusing on the conference talks; we do it in lots of settings, and it’s good to be reminded of what we’ve been taught in conference. But I think I’d encourage speakers to search the conference talks along with scriptures and other appropriate sources around a specific theme or topic, rather than assigning a talk. (Of course I don’t know what I’d actually do: hopefully I’d listen to the Spirit and do what I was prompted to do.)

But in this week’s meeting, even with just one talk between them, our adult speakers both hit home runs. I was fortunate to be there and to learn from them.

---
By the way:

1. Don't forget to check out the last finalists in the Four Centuries of Mormon Stories contest here.

2. And my latest post at Real Intent, "Venus & Mars and the Empty Bucket " is here.

Now what do I do?

What a terrific conference. I know the net is all abuzz about changes in ages for missionary service. Great stuff. And Elder Uchtdorf’s ties. Great stuff there, too.

I did not blog about conference before conference, but I DO love it. It’s a feast for me, plus I get to attend church from my La-Z-Boy in the family room. Awesome.

So, now that it’s over, what will I do? I’ll reflect on what I’ve heard. I’ll re-read my notes (those that I can read – my penmanship is really, really bad). And I’ll talk with my lovely wife about themes that we find important for our family and for ourselves. And I’ll think about which talks to study first when they are available (in a few days online and in next month’s Ensign). I’ve already put asterisks by some of the talks as I took notes.

I will do what Elder Osguthorpe suggested in his talk Sunday afternoon – I will ponder the conference messages and ask the Lord for understanding.

There are certain themes that lept out at me from the conference as I listened. I was impressed by how often the principle of repentance came up – and not in a “repent you sinners!” sort of way, but rather that repentance is part of our regular process as members. (My lovely wife described it as learning that it’s ok to be wrong; we can repent and move on.) I can, thanks to the atonement, leave the past behind.

I learned that if I feel a pavilion between the Lord and me, I probably built it. God knows where I am.

I learned our aging apostles, particularly Elders Packer and Hales, are teaching pretty basic and clear doctrine as they have for several conferences now (and, in the case of Elder Hales, for even longer), and it makes sense for me to ponder why the apostles, who can talk about whatever they want, choose (or are moved) to speak about basic gospel principles.

I learned about the value of temple standards – for the building and for me.

I learned that God can be my source of comfort when I need it the most (assuming I’ve torn down that pavilion).

I learned I can be one of many hands doing my small part to build the kingdom, and that’s ok.

I learned that my faith may lead me to more trials which can lead to greater faith. As I live my faith, I can grow in my conversion and have strength to continue in the gospel. This is an idea I’m anxious to explore more.

I will continue to ponder these and other learnings and consider how to incorporate them into our family gospel study and our family home evenings, and into my own life.

What will you do?


By the way -- check out my latest post at Real Intent, "The Driving Force of Parenting" here.

The Big One

Like others, I tend to see themes-for-me in conference. As I’ve blogged before, I took a couple of specific questions into conference with me. Those questions had me listening particularly closely for messages that had to do with how I related to my family.

In the spirit of listening for multiple messages (see here), I paid particular attention to repeated calls (to me and me alone) to be a better parent, and counsel about how I might do that. (I say to me and me alone for two reasons: First, President Uchtdorf told me I can’t judge anyone else; Second, my stewardship is my stewardship, not someone else’s, so of course the counsel I get will be for me.)

Here are some lessons I learned about my relationship with my family:

1. Elder Packer reminded me that a child is a nation, which means, I think, that a child represents all who come after him. He’s not the only one to suggest that when we save a child we may also save the subsequent generations that follow him, too. It’s a big responsibility.

2. Sister Esplin reminded me that I need to teach my children in love; I need to let the Spirit teach them. Frankly, in my 30 years of fatherhood, I’m not sure I’ve paid nearly enough attention to allowing the Spirit to teach my children, and I’ll be giving a lot of thought and prayer to how to do that.

3. Elder Koelliker taught me that I can help awaken in my children the desire in their hearts to know gospel truths. I have prayed for this often in my years as a parent. I’ll be looking for more help here, too.

4. President Eyring was clear: I must lead in saving my own family. It’s part of my role as a father and a priesthood holder. There are others who will help me, but I must take the lead. And I must do it using the principles of D&C 121.

5. Sister Beck reminded me that my wife has power and authority. There’s great value in my remembering that, especially in connection with #4.

6. As Elder Ballard talked about reforming our homes, I found myself thinking of ways I can reform mine. And how I can enlist the help of those who live there in that effort.

7. I need a vision for my family. Thanks, Elder Halek for that counsel. It’s not that I haven’t had a vision for my family before – or at least hopes and dreams – but I’ve never thought about it in this way. I don’t yet know what that vision is, but it will be the subject of continued pondering and prayer.

8. I cannot compel my children against their agency. Elder Wilson’s story at the beginning of his talk reminded me of something my father taught me when I was very young: having the priesthood does not grant a man the right to command anyone. That I cannot compel my children against their agency is more than counsel not to do it. It just really can’t be done. I wish I had learned that lesson earlier in my life than I did. (More D&C 121 – applicable to dads and moms.)

9. I should fill my home with courtesy and quickly resolve contentions. Thanks for that gentle nudge, President Monson. My take away is not that I should teach my children to do this thing. I should do it. I should lead by example, in love.

This is my mountain. And I’m thankful for it.

You can say that again!

On my mission, I was really impressed by a talk given in a zone conference by Elder Theodore M. Burton of the Seventy. (Regular readers will know I’ve referenced this talk before.)

One of the concepts he taught was that when we find repeated messages in the scriptures, it’s worth sitting up and taking notice. He suggested that when the Lord repeats himself through his prophets, the result is something that probably more important an obscure part of a verse in Habakkuk.

There’s another scripture study tool I learned before my mission. My Book of Mormon instructor my freshman year (a Brother Anderson, but I don’t know more than that, except that he had been my sister’s bishop and later served as president of the Tokyo Temple) taught us to write personal applications for what we’ve read.

I thought about both of those things as I listened to General Conference this past weekend. Here are a few of the repeat messages I heard. I’m sure there are more, and I invite you to share some of your own in the comments if you like.

1. I should stop judging others (period) – Both President Uchtdorf and Elder Cook taught this.

2. I will understand the blessings of holding the priesthood by serving others – Elder Bednar, President Uchtdorf and President Monson taught me this.

3. The Lord understands the burdens I carry and he can make them lighter – President Eyring, Elder Rasband, Elder Baxter and Elder Perry.

4. I can prepare myself better to receive personal revelation; I can listen more carefully and record the inspiration I receive – Elder Pieper and Elder Scott.

5. And, related to #4, I can improve my personal scripture study – Elder Scott, Elder Cook, Elder Christofferson.

There’s another very large theme that I took away from conference, but I’ll do a post on that one separately.

Conference is, as I suggested in Monday’s post, a wonderful thing to me. But I also feel like I’ve been handed a mountain. Thankfully, President Eyring reminded me that’s ok. I’m grateful for repeated messages that speak to my own needs.

When I begin to feel a little overwhelmed by my new “to be” list as a result of conference, I’m heartened by what Elder Anderson taught: Discipleship is a lifelong migration. Wherever I am on the road to discipleship, it is good to be on that road.

I've got questions. They've got answers

Just a quick post today.

I mentioned in my pre-conference post that I was, for the first time that I can remember, taking specific questions into conference with me. I told you I'd report back what happened.

Well, Saturday Morning and Priesthood, that's what.

I'm still not telling you what my questions were.

(My 11-year old shared her questions with me, but I refused to share mine with her. I told her maybe one of my questions was about her... Mine weren't about her (and I told her that), by the way, but I also didn't feel comfortable sharing them with her last night when she asked. But we did both observe that we did receive answers to our questions, and that was important to her.)

My questions were very specific, and the answers were, too. Some were frighteningly specific (frightening because of the work ahead of me).

I'll blog more on conference later, but I'll add this:

As usual I took notes on each talk. Last night my lovely wife and I discussed our impressions and what things we ought to begin to think about for our family as a result. It was, frankly, not a completely easy conversation. The work of gospel living is not always easy for me, especially when I see my shortcomings as clearly as in the light of a conference weekend.

But from my notes I've generated a bit of a punch list for myself (no, that's not a list that gives my 15-year old license to punch me; it's a stepped-up to-do/to-consider/to-meditate list).

I have plenty to do.

I *heart* conference!

I’m totally geeked for this weekend. I really enjoy General Conference. I watch all the sessions, take notes, sing along with the hymns (even some of the choir numbers, much to my teenager’s dismay), participate in the sustainings, all from the comfort of my La-Z-Boy recliner in my family room. And this year, we don’t even have to do a cumbersome PC-to-TV hookup because our new Roku box gives us access to BYU-TV.

My 11-year old daughter gave a great family night last week about how to get the most out of conference. (Ok, it was awesome. I helped.) She based it on a great article in the New Era and some ideas from The Friend. I’m happy she’s reading those magazines, and I was thrilled that she chose her lesson material from what she read.

We put together a little PowerPoint slide show (she really likes teaching from PowerPoint – we’ve done lessons this way about temples, olive trees and lots of other stuff).

One of the suggestions she pulled from the New Era was that we ought to come to conference with questions. I’ve never consciously done that before, but I’m trying it this year. No, I’m not going to tell you my questions; you’ll have to come up with your own. I certainly have gotten answers to questions from conference before, but that was more random. This year, I’m bringing a question or two with me to see if there is some specific counsel for me in the talks. (I’ll let you know how it goes.)

Another suggestion my daughter recommended: don’t get so caught up in the “games” (Conference Bingo is our favorite!) that you lose track of what’s being said. Since my youngest is 11, we’re moving out of the keep-them-entertained-every-minute mode of conference, which is kind of cool. Of course we’ve had nearly two decades of teenagers (so far), so we’re still in the keep-them-awake mode. But we try not to be drill sergeants about it. (No, I’m not offering space for a rebuttal by my teenager; you’ll have to take my word for it.)

I should point out that my teenager also taught a conference preparation lesson this week in FHE. (He admitted that he didn't remember his sister had taught one the week before, but it was all good.) He included this cool video:



I hope you enjoy conference this weekend as much as I will!

Where's the mark?

I have to hand it to the correlation committee. This year the linkage between the Sunday School lessons and the George Albert Smith lessons is pretty awesome. Several weeks this year I’ve been really touched by how well the two lessons fit together. Yesterday was a great case in point, especially given the season we’re in.

As I read for each lesson during the week (and I am one of those who actually reads the lessons ahead of time, even if I’m not teaching), I found this familiar verse in Jacob:

But behold, the Jews were a stiffnecked people; and they despised the words of plainness, and killed the prophets, and sought for things that they could not understand. Wherefore, because of their blindness, which blindness came by looking beyond the mark, they must needs fall; for God hath taken away his plainness from them, and delivered unto them many things which they cannot understand, because they desired it. And because they desired it God hath done it, that they may stumble (Jacob 4:14, emphasis mine).

Jacob teaches that one reason the Jews lost the plain and precious truths is because they did not want to hear those things. They preferred instead the things which they could not understand. They were blind because they looked beyond the mark.

We read this verse in family scripture reading recently, and I asked my daughter what happens if she aims her new-at-Christmas bow and arrow above her target. Her response: the arrows go over the target. (Fortunately, she did not say, "Duh, Dad...")

Then I read this passage in the GAS manual:

There are those among us … who have been blinded by the philosophies and foolishness of men. There are those who reject the advice and counsel of the man that God has placed at the head of this Church. …

People who haven’t very much information suddenly come along with a bright idea, and they suggest “this is the way” or “that is the way,” and although it is in conflict with the advice of the Lord some are persuaded to try it. The Lord has given safe advice and appointed the President of his Church to interpret that advice. If we ignore what he advises, as the President of the Church, we may discover that we have made a serious mistake.

President Smith and Jacob are well-aligned.

Soon General Conference will be upon us again, and I, for one, will be looking for my mark from our living prophets. I invite you to do the same.

Thanks, Sister Dalton, for your counsel to fathers

First, Sister Dalton, thanks! We don’t often have sisters in conference speak directly to fathers. I know my daughters are not my possession. But I know they are my daughters, on loan from our Father in Heaven, and I’d like to do what I can to help them find their way home again.

Thanks for continuing to think about how our daughters can find their way home, and how we can help them succeed in developing into the women we hope that they will be: strong, faithful and virtuous, confident that God loves them and confident in His plan for their happiness.

Thanks for reminding me to love my wife. I always like getting a challenge that is easy to meet.

And thanks for challenging me to model virtue in my own life, confirming that it is not just a value for young women, but also for their fathers.

I’m happy to report I have never had to go looking for any of my daughters because they didn’t come home on time. (Of course, the youngest is only 11, so I suppose there’s still time for me to have that experience!) ;-)

The Awesome Elder Hales

I was surprised when I saw Elder Hales at conference. I live far from SLC and was not aware of the seriousness of his continuing health concerns, so when I saw him at conference, I was really shocked by how he looked.

Elder Hales is the only living apostle I've ever met personally. When I lived in Venezuela, I was his driver when he and his wife came for a regional conference. Since that brief chance to get to know him a little, I've paid close attention when he's spoken in conference. And I've found he's given some of the most straightforward talks on key gospel principles over the years.

His talk Sunday morning was delightful, and it was a great personal blessing for me to be able to hear him speak.

Two quotations from his talk struck me in particular, but for different reasons. The first:

Too often we pray to have patience but we want it right now.

This is a consistent message of his for some time now. He has talked before about his own health concerns and how he's even wondered if he has learned enough from them. And, of course, I'm one of those who so prays.

The second:

To all the Marys and Marthas, to all the good Samaritans who minister to the sick, succor the weak and care for the mentally and physically infirm, I feel the gratitude of a loving Heavenly Father and His blessed son. In your daily Christ-like ministry you are willing to wait upon the Lord and you are doing our Heavenly Father’s will. His assurance to you is clear: Inasmuch as you have done it unto the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me. He knows your sacrifices and your sorrows. He hears your prayers. His peace and rest will be yours.

This quotation was my balm in Gilead for this conference, and if I had heard nothing else, this would have been feast enough. It is that sweet apostolic comfort that few can give and reassures me to my core.

Bless you, Elder Hales.

Update Oct 10, 2010: Here's a link to an item at LDS Newsroom on Elder Hales' recovery.

How Can You Beat TV Church?

TV Church. That’s what a friend of mine calls conference weekend.

I love conference, and I really look forward to its coming around each Fall and Spring. We have for quite a number of years participated at home via the internet. We don’t get cable (and none of our local cable stations carry conference anyway), and we can’t use a dish because our home’s trees don’t allow a clear line of sight to the satellite (without a VERY tall tower which I’m unwilling to have built). So I’m thrilled that the church has dramatically improved the availability of video feeds of conference through the computer.

We used to go to the stake center in our family’s pre-internet days (yes, children, there was a time when not every home had a computer with a high-speed connection). I can remember spending conference weekend in the “children’s” room with kids playing on the floor while we watched the small TV at the front of the room. (I remember sneaking out of that room into the cultural hall for the solemn assembly sustaining of President Benson.)

The internet has been especially helpful when we lived in Asia recently. “Conference weekend” is a week later there, since the live broadcasts are in the middle of the night. Sessions were available at our stake center in Mandarin and English, though we watched most of them at home, thrilled to have figured out how to use our TV as a monitor for our daughter’s laptop. (Yes, we can be taught…)

This was all a marked improvement over our experience in Japan years ago, when we'd received videos of conference weeks later and circulate them among the English speaking members of our ward. By the time we got to Venezuela, we had someone in Utah record the English sessions for us, since only Spanish tapes came to the stake, but we convinced our stake president to allow us to watch a session of conference in lieu of Sunday School and Priesthood; there was a real power in our ward's being able to watch conference together.

My wife and I tend to be note takers during conference. I do it out of habit – for years I had one assignment or another that required me to be able to recall what happened at conference (either planning speaking assignments or preparing conference quizzes for seminary or institute or priesthood lessons). My wife (again) has a calling where she participates in determining which talks will be used for the Teaching For Our Times lessons.

Now I tend to take note of my impressions during the talks more than the subject matter of the talks. I note talks I’ll want to go back and read or listen to first when they’re available. (I also load the talks onto my I-Pod as fast as I can so I can listen to them en route to work shortly after they are televised; hearing them a second time allows me to get new nuances I’d missed the first time around.)

I try hard to go into conference with a clean slate of expectations for the meeting. Of course I pray about issues that are important to me and listen for counsel on those subjects. But I try not to guess what the speaker will say before he or she says it. Sometimes I’m surprised; sometimes I’m comforted; sometimes I’m gently prodded to improve (sometimes by my son who hears a talk he thinks I need to pay specific attention to: a number of years ago when Elder Oaks told fathers what their children wanted most for dinner was for their fathers to be home, my son leaned over to me and said, “He’s right, Dad”).

Our children are getting too old for conference bingo, though I think we may implement a little game our sister-in-law uses. She sets out bowls of various goodies with a word attached to each one. When the word is mentioned in a talk or song, the goodies are available to those who hear it. (He who hath ears to hear, let him munch!) That might be enough to keep my 15-year old awake for a session or two.

I hope you’ll fire up your La-Z-Boy and enjoy some TV Church of your own this weekend.

You can tune in at lds.org. Live sessions are Saturday and Sunday at 10 and 2 MDT in the US (UTC +6).

On Consecration and Welfare

This quotation from President Eyring caught my attention in conference:

His way of helping has at times been called living the law of consecration. In another period His way was called the united order. In our time it is called the Church welfare program.

The names and the details of operation are changed to fit the needs and conditions of people. But always the Lord’s way to help those in temporal need requires people who out of love have consecrated themselves and what they have to God and to His work.

I was reminded of when I taught a fifth-Sunday lesson years ago. I asked the class if the law of consecration had been “repealed.” Many in the class said it had. And I disagreed.

I have always drawn a distinction between the united order and the law of consecration. The former, it seemed to me, was a method of implementing the latter. But the abolition of the united order did not mean the law of consecration was dead. I acknowledge that in Kirtland there was a more open practice of concecration which was distinct from the United Order. But the principles of concecration are very much alive. President Eyring seems to echo that idea, suggesting that today’s welfare program is similar to the law of consecration. (Of course, Nibley echoes this sentiment also in his essay, “The Law of Consecration,” found in his collection Approaching Zion.)

One of the key messages of the Book of Mormon for me is that we can judge a people by how they treat the poor among them. King Benjamin offers counsel to individuals as well as to his entire kingdom as he reminds them about the relationship of serving others and serving God (see Mosiah 2:17). His injunction to share of our surplus with the poor in order to retain a remission of our sins seems a personal injunction:

And now, for the sake of these things which I have spoken unto you—that is, for the sake of retaining a remission of your sins from day to day, that ye may walk guiltless before God—I would that ye should impart of your substance to the poor, every man according to that which he hath, such as feeding the hungry, clothing the naked, visiting the sick and administering to their relief, both spiritually and temporally, according to their wants (Mosiah 4:26)

Nibley’s essay, “How to Get Rich” (also in Approaching Zion) reminds us of several rules given to the Israelites in Deuteronomy (“And,” he clarifies, “the rules for them are the rules for us!” (emphasis his)):

1. Everything you have or ever will have, individually and collectively, is a gift from God; you owe it all to Him (179-180).
2. We have not earned the good things we enjoy. God Himself gave us the capacity for success because of the covenant He made with our fathers (182).
3. Since God is giving it all away free to everyone, regardless of all other circumstances, everyone has a right to whatever he needs to live on (184).

So what is left for me to do? It seems it is more than just slipping the value of two fasted meals into the blue envelope each month.

Among the bishop’s resources for the care of the poor and needy are fast offering funds, food from the bishops’ storehouse, services of LDS Employment Services and LDS Family Services, and Deseret Industries (even available in my Midwestern community as a training resource), and me.

The Lord’s storehouse, available to each bishop in each ward, also includes all the resources – “the time, talents, compassion, materials, and financial means” – of members of his ward (Handbook II 6.1.3).

So, President Eyring, King Benjamin and Jehovah (as recorded in Leviticus & summarized by Nibley) remind me of a few things about a covenant that I have made:

1. Everything I have is God’s.
2. Even if I “earned” something, my ability to do so came from God, so see #1.
3. Returning a portion of what is already God’s back to God (like tithing) and calling it a day is not enough.
4. I must share my surplus – whatever I don’t need to live on.
5. How I care for the poor will determine whether I retain a remission of my sins.
6. Sharing of my surplus is the essence of the welfare program, but sharing it through the welfare program is not the only way I can do it.

Now, to sort out what I need to live on so I can understand the surplus…

My conference Top Ten

I’m trying to hang on to the spirit of conference for just a few more days. Here are ten of my favorite thoughts that I noted as I listened over the weekend. Feel free to add yours in the comments if you like.

By the way, I note that texts are available at lds.org today (but were not by the time I posted this -- but are now); I have not yet consulted them. These are from my notes, and I freely admit that I may not have heard exactly what the speaker said. But this is what “spoke” to me.

Elder Gonzales: Our covenants are an expression of love.

President Eyring: Act on covenants to help others. And remember, Bishop: The Relief Society President may receive revelation before you.

Elder Ballard: Don’t look for the large nuggets: look for the flecks of gold

President Uchtdorf: Am I going to through motions or am I experiencing joy?

Sister Allred: Her international experience as a Relief Society leader.

Elder Bednar: Light as a metaphor for testimony. The experience of Saul / Joseph Smith / Alma the Younger are unusual, not “normal.” (I note that President Uchtdorf also taught a similar message.)

President Monson: Sacrifice now in temple service as others did in temple building in the past.

Elder Scott: A beautiful testament of his love for his wife. Satan seeks to undermine the significant of temple ordinances.

Elder Robbins: No checklist to “be”.

Elder Holland: Bedlamites. If we speak with the spirit and you listen with the spirit, prophetic epistles will come.

There are others, and I’m sure that I’ll find more as I read and listen again to the talks in the coming weeks. Maybe these will remind you of something you heard that touched your heart. I hope so.

Post Conference Let-Down

I remember on my mission that I loved zone conferences. I could see other missionaries I knew. I could escape the day-to-day grind of whatever city I was working in. I could listen to my mission president (whom I loved). We often would spend a part of the conference doing street contacting, and always with other companions than our own (which, depending on the time of my mission was a blessing to me and / or to my companion).

I happened always to travel to another city for zone conference, and always by train. I found that whatever spirit I took with me out of the conference seemed to have a half-life equal to the time it took the train to roll into my city. Getting back to the same-old-same-old seemed to overshadow the spirit of the conference.

I find that General Conference is the same way. I love spending the weekend listening to the talks and music. We prod our kids to listen, plying them with snacks for Conference Bingo or whatever inducement we are using. (This time is was a suggestion from The Friend: my daughter wrote the topic, a quotation and a personal application or action for each talk.) I take notes of what I hear and what I feel prompted to do.

But still, come Sunday evening, it’s all a bit of a blur. Those talks I felt sure I would remember all mix together in the conference stew in my head and by Monday morning, I can rarely remember who said what, except in the broadest of terms.

Of course, I’ll review my notes, and I’ll listen to the talks on my i-Pod, and I’ll read the talks in the Ensign when it comes out. In our ward, most sacrament meetings are based on conference talks (sometimes too much so, but that’s another post), and of course we’ll cover some of the talks in Teaching For Our Times lessons in priesthood.

But even with all that study, the spirit of the conference, of the meetings themselves, of having the speakers in my family room with me, of listening to the remarkable music (and even the remarkably slow music…), of sustaining the general authorities and auxiliary leaders, of hearing the off-the-cuff remarks that don’t make it into the written record, does not always shine through in the same way.

So, I’ll do my best to remember what I felt this weekend, and I’ll remember to come back in October for more.

A conference tale

A friend told me years ago a story he’d heard. Of course, he was telling the story second hand (he reported that his friend had heard it related by a visiting authority at a stake conference), and therefore likely got specifics wrong, and it’s been many years since he told me the story so I’ll likely get details wrong, too.

Seems there was a member of the Seventy sitting in conference in the tabernacle (helps you know how long ago it was!) listening to yet another of the brethren speak about a basic principle of the gospel as he watched dust float in the shafts of light. He wondered when the Saints would finally graduate from milk to meat, when conference talks could be substantive and filled with new (or at least rich) doctrine.

As the session ended, he rose to leave the hall, saddened that there was nothing new to be learned at this session. As he looked up to go, he saw two brethren embracing, tears streaming down their faces, talking about the wonderful spirit they had felt in the conference session that day.

And he was saddened that he had missed it.

Conference and Learning at Home

I love conference weekend, and it’s not just that I get to attend church from my La-Z-Boy recliner in the family room. (We’ve come a long way from getting just one session, time-delayed, over the local PBS station!) Since my time in the MTC (before it was the MTC, in fact), I’ve really tried to participate in as many sessions as possible. Because I’ve never lived in Salt Lake City, that participation has always included some electronic connection, and I’m grateful for ever-increasing improvements in that regard.

I was reading a talk that David Bednar gave while he was president of BYU-I (“Teach Them To Understand”, BYU-I Education Week, June 4, 1998) , and he caused me to reflect on 3 Nephi 17:1-3:

Behold, now it came to pass that when Jesus had spoken these words he looked round about again on the multitude, and he said unto them: Behold, my time is a t hand. I perceive that ye are weak, that ye cannot understand all my words which I am commanded of the Father to speak unto you at this time. Therefore, go to your homes, and ponder upon the things which I have said, and ask of the Father, in my name, that ye may understand, and prepare your minds for the morrow, and I come unto again.

Always before, I had read those verses as a sign of the Savior’s compassion (I see you’re tired, so I’ll stop), and a suggestion that they go home and get some rest.

But Elder Bednar (he was an area seventy during his time at BYU-I, so I think I can still refer to him as Elder Bednar even in that period) suggests a further bit of learning:

What a marvelous formula! (1) Go to your home, (2) ponder upon the things that have been said, (3) ask the Father in Christ’s name that you will understand, and (4) prepare your mind for additional instruction.

This weekend as I watch conference, I’ll remember Elder Bednar’s counsel. After three sessions of conference on Saturday (including Priesthood), I’m sure I’ll be a little weak (our excellent pre-Priesthood ice cream social notwithstanding). But I’ll also make an effort to ponder about what I’ve heard, to pray for understanding, and to prepare for more instruction the next day.

Sunday Conference Impressions

Here are some of my favorites from Sunday's conference sessions:

1. Elder Uchtdorf's message, "You are Christ's hands." I appreciate his thought that we ought not to make others feel deficient, and that it is wrong to suggest those who suffer deserve their suffering.

2. Elder Scott's Easter message, which echoed Elder Holland's from last year that suggested that God did not forsake the Savior on the cross.

3. Elder Cook's call for civility in our discourse even when we disagree, suggesting that a measure of how we follow the Savior can be seen in how we disagree.

4. President Monson's touching Easter message with the greatest words in Christendom including the words, "He is risen!" That the darkness of death can be dispelled by the light of truth. I was particularly touched hearing the story of the family who lost a son to illness while sitting in the home of a family that had done the same.

5. Elder Nelson's linking of Family History to the atonement, and his gentle prodding that I need to get to work!

6. Elder Hales story: "Grandpa, are you in there?"

7. That Elder Foster is a farmer and a rancher.

8. Elder Anderson's recommendation that we speak more of Jesus Christ with our children.

9. President Monson's concluding counsel to look to the lighthouse of the Lord.

What touched you?

Saturday Conference Impressions

After the first day of conference, I've already begun assembling some favorite thoughts and passages:

1. President Monson's going "off script" in his opening remarks to talk about his beloved Frances. Very sweet and human view of this couple who have spent so many years together.

2. Elder Packer's discussion of authority and power of the priesthood. I had heard his telling of the story of the ordination of the pre-mission elder in a leadership meeting in Michigan. He also noted then that he could have ordained the father if need be, but didn't call it a battlefield promotion that time. Nice touch.

3. Sister Beck's discussion of personal revelation as being most important for women. And her quoting of Eliza R. Snow was awesome!

4. Elder Anderson's reminder of the experience on Parley Street in Nauvoo. I reflected on my own tears as I read those signs he talked about and was appropriately jolted by the hope he described in those departing Nauvoo residents. His reiteration of the need for proper profession care for those who suffer from clinical depression impressed me, too.

5. I was grateful for my mother and my wife as I listened to Elder Ballard.

6. Elder Perry's memories of his mother's preparing for lessons was wonderful, and hinted that such careful preparation is even possible with highly "correlated" lessons. I remembered my mother's helping my dad research high council talks, and how she prepared her own lessons. And I think about my wife's preparations for her Relief Society lessons.

7. Elder Christopherson's comment that God's commandments give protection from self-inflicted pain.

8. Elder Bednar's concept of an early warning signal in our homes (and wondering how I've done with that in the past), coupled with Elder Eyring's call to rescue early.

9. Elder Holland's frank and honest discussion of pornography, done in his own remarkable style.

10. Elder Oaks' clear discussion of healing blessings, clarifying the need to take advantage of all methods of healing, including blessings. His acknowledgement that faith to do miracles exists outside the church as well as in. And his teaching that the words of the blessing are not the most important part (to suggest that we should not fear being voice).

11. Elder Rasband's look into how missionary assignments are made.

12. The First Presidency messages from General Priesthood: Patience, Diligence and Standards. Masterful discourses all. I agree with President Monson: it was one of the best priesthood sessions I've attended.

What touched you?

General Conference!

It's about twenty minutes to conference, and I'm as excited as I can be. The semi-annual general conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is a great gift to me.

It hasn't always been so. I grew up in Pittsburgh where we watched one session on public television, sometimes at home and sometimes at church, but usually on a Fast Sunday (so as a kid I sat in the kitchen watching TV but not being able to eat!).

When I got to BYU as a freshman, conference was everywhere, but I didn't watch it all. It was not part of my habit.

While I was in the MTC, I watched all the sessions of conference for the first time in my life. I made connections between the speakers, discovered some speakers I really enjoyed and others I didn't understand so well. But mostly, watching the conference in that setting, I caught the spirit of the meetings, the talks, the music. I took notes, and learned new things.

When I was on my mission in Germany, I saw or heard very little of conference until my last one when I listened to direct-wire broadcast of a couple of sessions, one in German and one in English (for the benefit of the US servicemen who shared the chapel we attended).

When I came home, I made more of an effort to listen and / or watch, though sometimes a college work schedule interfered. But it wasn't until I went to grad school back in Pittsburgh that I really became an adult convert to the "all sessions" conference. I had the assignment to do a follow-up lesson in Elders Quorum on the conference, so I determined I would attend all the sessions at our stake center (where our ward met). We took the kids along and they played in the children's room while we watched on the TV there. That became our pattern for years to come until we could listen or watch at home on the internet.

When we lived in Japan, tapes were made available to us well after conference. In Venezuela, we received tapes made by my wife's brother (he lived in Ogden), and we arranged to watch a session at church after sacrament meeting several weeks after conference. In Taiwan, we had "conference weekend" the week following conference in Salt Lake, and again we watched at home via computer.

Now that we're back in the US, we are watching while visiting family over conference weekend.

I still take notes, even though I haven't done a conference summary lesson since I taught institute in my stake several years ago. Note taking helps to focus my attention and to note key messages (for me) in the speakers. I enjoy returning to the conference issue of the Ensign, and listening to the talks again on my i-Pod.

Enjoy conference! (And tune in at www.lds.org, if you like!)